Ice-Cold Soft Drinks

During my wrestling career, I had the good fortune of traveling a lot. I remember working for the Tulsa, Oklahoma wrestling office when I met a great tag team that wrestled as bothers and called themselves “Spudnick & Rocket Monroe.” I watched their matches and learned a lot from them.

Everyone has both good and bad habits. Rocket had a habit of chewing Red Man Tobacco, the long and stringy kind. To Rocket, chewing tobacco was like an art form. He would sometimes put different small pieces of fruit or some liquor in the tobacco pouch to change the flavor to his liking. Of course, while chewing this tobacco, one has to spit the juice out so Rocket always carried a spit cup of sorts with him, you know, an empty soft drink or coffee cup.

One very hot summer night, we were booked in a town that the wrestlers like because it always drew a good crowd. That meant, the wrestlers would have a good pay-day. The promoter did not get the air conditioning turned on soon enough so it was hot outside and inside too. The air conditioning was not cooling the dressing rooms down yet and it was uncomfortable. We were sweating before we even got in the ring! All the wrestlers were coming into the dressing rooms to change into their wrestling gear; most of them had stopped at the concession stand and got a cold drink to bring with them.

The dressing rooms were not very large so all the wrestlers were spread out anywhere the could find room to change. I was sitting on a bench lacing my boots up when I heard a lot of loud talking and laughing coming from the doorway. When I looked up, I saw Spudnik and Rocket Monroe enter the dressing room with soft drinks in their hands. the only space left to sit down was at the ends of two adjoining benches that were divided by a large hot water tank for the showers. Rocket sat on one side, and Spudnick sat on the other. They set their soft drinks on top of the hot water tank while they were changing clothes. Rocket drank all his drink and got out his favorite chewing tobacco. He began chewing and of course, his cup was empty so he used it for the spit cup.

The matches started and the crowd began yelling. They were cheering for their favorites and booing for the less favorites. My match was just before Spudnick and Rocket’s match. After I had finished my match, I headed for the dressing room where it was still very hot. I finished drinking my own soft drink and was headed for the showers when Spudnic and Rocket made their way to the ring for their match. There’s was a long one, two out of three falls.

I had finished dressing and was packing my bag to leave when I heard the dressing room door bang open. Spudnick and Rocket burst in, sweating profusely, leaving little puddles of sweat wherever they walked. As they started to change, Spudnick, still standing up, put his foot up on the bench and began unlacing his boot. He looked up and saw the ice-cold drink that he had not finished prior to his match still sitting on the water tank where he left it. Both Spudnick and Rocket were dying of thirst so Spudnick started “ribbing” Rocket because he didn’t have a cold drink. Spudnick laughed out loud and started guzzling his drink. After four or five big gulps, he stopped drinking and just stared into the drink cup with a peculiar look on his face. He then immediately spit out what he had thought to be soft drink but soon realized was actually the contents of Rocket’s warm and nasty spit cup. Spudnick ran into the bathroom, dropped to his knees and threw up repeatedly into the toilet. Everyone in the dressing room was laughing so hard we had tears in our eyes. When he came out of the bathroom, he was swearing at everyone, including me, and then started kicking and throwing chairs around the dressing room. He yelled out and told everyone in detail what he was going to do to that stupid “S.O.B.” that switched his soft drink cup. Now I have heard that old saying, that someone was so sick they turned green and never quite knew what it meant. After seeing Spudnick’s face that night, I know have a pretty good idea where that old saying came from.

No one would admit to it but someone had indeed switched the soft drink cups while the two brothers were in the ring for their match. It was a good rib and it left poor old Spudnick sick for hours.

In the world of Professional Wrestling, you must always be on the alert for those guys who love to play ribs; but remember, getting even is always just as much fun ?

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